A Tweet has gone viral about a young woman who send an exit survey to men she dates at the end of a relationship.
Questions on the exit survey included:
-What is wrong with Katie?
-What is wrong with you?
-At what point did you know this wouldn’t work out?
-Would you refer Katie to a friend? If so, please list numbers here.
While it’s unorthodox (ok, it’s strange), I appreciate wanting to be reflective and to learn from mistakes. It can be easy when a relationships ends to want to blame the other person, but usually when relationships end, it’s a two way street.
Anytime a person has a relationship end, it’s helpful to ask how you contributed to the end of it. Otherwise it can be easy to get into a cycle of one failed relationship after another where a person keeps dating the same kinds of people and making the same types of mistakes thinking that things will be so much easier when they find this mythical “the one.”
As I already mentioned, the Tweet referencing the survey has already been liked 21,000 times.
Although not everyone is a fan. Some comments I saw on articles were negative, saying “Run!” and calling it crazy, others mocking the young lady and saying things like “I think I know why she’s single.” Again, I realize it’s unusual. But there’s also nothing wrong with wanting some closure. And at the end of a relationship, if a little constructive reflection can leave both people suited to be better off in their next relationship, that strikes me as a good thing. Especially if a person chooses to respond and add some insights.
Before getting married, I know there were times when things would inexplicably end and I didn’t always get the opportunity to find out why. So I can definitely empathize with a person wanting that closure.
Thanks for reading! I’d love to hear what you think, and don’t forget to subscribe!
Josh Benner is the associate pastor at Cornerstone Evangelical Free Church in Fergus Falls, Minnesota and has a Master of Divinity from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. He enjoys writing about faith and culture. He lives with his wife Kari in Minnesota.